Last day of 2011

well... today its the last day for the year 2011, lets see what i have done in this year. hmm... in the beginning i've got a gf, but yet until now i still don't know its whos problem that break us up, anyway its doesn't really matters anymore, cause i dont give a $h!t alrd.

i have a wonderful birthday inviting my kepong frens + apiit frens to my house and have a bbq party , woot that was nicee ~ but yet, organizing a bbq events its tiring.

of cause, this year i meet quite a number of new frens, they were all nice , but maybe some have their own thought in their own heart so its hard to guess, but as long as they didn't hurts me, i don't really care also :)

well... i successfully proceed to level 3, and i suppose to be hard working to get my 2nd upper class, but maybe because of those holiday or what i just don't really feels like studying, therefore this will be one of my main aims to achieve in the coming year 2012, studyy hard dude, u must get ur 2nd upper!

hmm... well, around the end of this years i have decide to change myself a little, trying to transform myself into a girls magnet, or maybe at least girls won't be scared away by me again. so 1st of i will have to train myself to communicate well with them, still working in progress and i believe in the coming year i will get it done as well.

well.. ice is moving to new building in this coming year, so i guess i would rarely see her again, i'm gonna miss u ice :(

so the aim for 2012:
- study hard and graduate with good grade or better yet get an 2nd upper
- train my communication skill, not to only impress girls but everyone in the world
- read more books, or i should say finish a book
- motivate myself, do what i should done, do not what i shouldn't
- make use of money wisely, do not simply buy stuff without considering
- find some part-time job to work for, earn some cash for my own use
- get a girlfriend :)


... *to be added*

so in the end, good bye to this sad yet beautiful year of 2011.
welcome my great 2012, its the year of dragon, let me unleashed my force, my power, my wisdom!
happy new yearrr !!! to whom who read this post, wish u have a wonderful 2012 year and all the best :D

i am so tired~!

well.. indeed, last night was a very very fun night advance Christmas dinner for my college mate, but yet, i am actually tired of making them laugh, i am tired of doing stupid thing in front of all people. I am so tired, so exhausted that i could barely awake here, what happen to me? where is my OWNself? i think i lost it, since when? i am not sure. but i all i know is i have been wearing a mask for too long already, long enough that makes me lost myself, i don't know where or how to find back myself, i am depressed ! well... if i told my college friends that i am tired being like a SH last night, they will all just say its because of ICE( a girl who i wanted to get close with but in the end failed) but seriously, i just don't think so. its not because of anyone, its me myself that feels tired, physically, mentally. to be exact, its my hearts feels tired, tired of getting laugh by all people, tired of getting fools by others, tired of being alone when everybody is there and enjoying the party. not to say that i am not enjoyed, but yet just tired, its the inner part of my feels tired, that is the hardest part to get cure. and there must be a reason why i have been doing all these stuff right? and its silly, its because of alone also. if i did not join then for having fun, and sit there alone drinking beer they will say i am EMO, lol... c'mon dude, i am just tired ok ~! i guess that the problem, if i has been sitting alone there not joining anyone there, no people will come to be and talks with me either, i mean they won't come and join me there, and that is the feeling of lonely in a party, i do not want to be alone, therefore i choose to be a clown for them, to get attraction from them, but yet clown is just a part-timer, he will get tired anyway. people's just don't thinks that way, they thought "you are a clown, to make people's happy is your job, and also your professionalism", so this is what i am best of? making fun of me? or i make laughter for u guys there? i just want to be a normal people.

过去的~

过去的，就让她过去，我要努力的朝向我的新生活出发。对不起，如果我做的太绝的话，因为你的出现会让我很难释怀。我看到你，我就会停下脚步，我看到你，我即使不在意的我又八卦了起来，对你的事又感兴趣起来了。从现在开始，我会回避你，逃避你，尽管 别人怎么说，我都会这样做。你可以不睬我，恨我，讨厌我，什么都好，对不起，这次我是不会回头了。我已经把你facebook的news update隐藏了，把你的信息都删除了，也把我们的合照从这blog删除了。原因是，我的武功实在不够高强，还是没办法视而不见，听而不闻。对不起，这是我到最后都想对你说的话。
这。。。将会是关于你的最后一个心情故事。祝福你，再见。

关于TJ和Evelyn的故事，到此，结束。